My daughter copied me into a post of a few women saying why they were not feminists. The post attracted many comments, mostly from people who disagreed and some brave souls who agreed. I say brave not because I agree with those who disagreed (stay with me...) but because it is easy to post something that supports the majority view.
I had a few thoughts as I was reading the comments and you may be disappointed that some of my thoughts raised more questions than definite positions but here they are.
Firstly, I wondered how something that is based on a 'good' idea i.e. all humans having equal value becomes distorted into something bad.. I remember when I was young - and maybe it is still the same today - there was a term 'do-gooders' that was used as an insult. It was mainly used against beleaguered professions like social workers who may not have got things right all of the time but at least they tried to do something. I think this is similar.
Secondly, whilst I disagree with some of the 'how' people have tried to move this agenda forward, I whole-heartedly support the 'what'- all people are equal. To have a system that ranks different types of people in an order of perceived value is dangerous and we only have to look at recent history, and in fact current events to see what happens to those not in the majority. 'Cleansing' is another word that now has a different use.
Thirdly, to hold up physical strength as the only quality of a male that is worth anything is a huge disservice to the millions of men who have other qualities and are not 'Mr Muscle'. What I mean is, the idea that women cannot be equal because they are not as strong seems strange. There are some women in the world who are stronger than some men. Where does that leave the men who are less strong than some women? Should they be paid 20% less than other men perhaps....?
Fourthly (is that a word?), I have known and worked for and with some great men who are able to use a wide range of traits and skills from the spectrum. I am part of the John Maxwell Team and have people like Paul Martinelli and Christian Simpson as mentors and thinking partners - they are decisive and focused whilst also being collaborative and caring about the people around them. I also know some great women with wide skill sets. The most difficult people to work for, in my experience, are those who are too far along either spectrum - too focused or too caring for example, regardless of whether they are male or female.
Finally, I wished that the comments on the post were focused more on the topic and less on personal attacks. Everyone is entitled to their opinion and I was left thinking that respect of individuals must be part of the feminist ideal. Demanding to be heard involves listening.
I had a few thoughts as I was reading the comments and you may be disappointed that some of my thoughts raised more questions than definite positions but here they are.
Firstly, I wondered how something that is based on a 'good' idea i.e. all humans having equal value becomes distorted into something bad.. I remember when I was young - and maybe it is still the same today - there was a term 'do-gooders' that was used as an insult. It was mainly used against beleaguered professions like social workers who may not have got things right all of the time but at least they tried to do something. I think this is similar.
Secondly, whilst I disagree with some of the 'how' people have tried to move this agenda forward, I whole-heartedly support the 'what'- all people are equal. To have a system that ranks different types of people in an order of perceived value is dangerous and we only have to look at recent history, and in fact current events to see what happens to those not in the majority. 'Cleansing' is another word that now has a different use.
Thirdly, to hold up physical strength as the only quality of a male that is worth anything is a huge disservice to the millions of men who have other qualities and are not 'Mr Muscle'. What I mean is, the idea that women cannot be equal because they are not as strong seems strange. There are some women in the world who are stronger than some men. Where does that leave the men who are less strong than some women? Should they be paid 20% less than other men perhaps....?
Fourthly (is that a word?), I have known and worked for and with some great men who are able to use a wide range of traits and skills from the spectrum. I am part of the John Maxwell Team and have people like Paul Martinelli and Christian Simpson as mentors and thinking partners - they are decisive and focused whilst also being collaborative and caring about the people around them. I also know some great women with wide skill sets. The most difficult people to work for, in my experience, are those who are too far along either spectrum - too focused or too caring for example, regardless of whether they are male or female.
Finally, I wished that the comments on the post were focused more on the topic and less on personal attacks. Everyone is entitled to their opinion and I was left thinking that respect of individuals must be part of the feminist ideal. Demanding to be heard involves listening.